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House encounters bird strike on Warm Springs Road

House encounters bird strike on Warm Springs Road

Turkey flies off the handle, demands window seat

By Paul Goguen

Last week a lone, unescorted turkey hen wandered into the yard of a house on the 4000 block of Warm Springs Rd. She was there to forage, scratch for bugs and deposit toxiclooking black droppings, as turkeys are wont to do. Startled perhaps by the ghost of manicured lawns past, she lifted off and flew across the yard, right through a closed double-pane window and into the house, crashlanding on a bed. Unfortunately, the victim

A turkey sized hole in the window at the back of the house shows the amount of bird velocity generated by the hen. The garrish move was remeniscent of the Cool-Aid man wall breaches from the 70’s. Most of the contents of the room were badly damaged humans. Two days ago, she returned with a tom in tow, and I imagine the victim will see less of her now. Be on the lookout for a battle-scarred turkey with a penchant for barnstorming.

of the intrusion was in said bed and took the brunt of the glass and bloodied hen up close and personal.

The human resident of the house was bleeding profusely from face lacerations; when asked if he was okay, he quipped, “You should see the other turkey.” The hen hadn’t fared much better — bleeding and likely in shock, she had settled on the floor. An assemblage of turkey extraction equipment was deployed and a plan was hatched. The favored option was to open the door and let her walk out on her own power, but turkeys can be unpredictable and intellectually challenged. After raising the blind from the outside with a pole-saw and a little encouragement from the inside, she made her escape, a little shaken but intact. The room was trashed, like someone had drank a whole bottle of Wild Turkey in there. It will require scrubbing, painting, carpet and, of course, a new window. The turkey hen has returned three times recently and appears to have recovered, as the bent and broken feathers have fallen away. She’s very relaxed and gets quite close to

A wild turkey in the bedroom of a house on Warm Springs Rd. The hen flew through the window, which looked like blue sky in the reflection.

Photo by unnamed bird strike victim.