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Publishers’ Corner

 

Bad oysters?  Imposters make a scene at Salt & Stone

By Melissa Dowling

According to an anonymous note sent to the Kenwood Press, on the evening of Sept. 11, two unidentified patrons who claimed to be employees of the Kenwood Press caused an incident at Salt & Stone restaurant on Sonoma Highway. The note read: “This evening in the Salt & Stone bar area there was an incident involving two Kenwood Press employees. The waitress said that these two people were annoyed with the slow service and left without paying. Additionally, word got around the bar that it was Kenwood Press employees who left without paying.”

The person who allegedly authored this note was not an actual witness to the event, but someone who heard it from someone who heard it from someone who was there.

Since the KP has only two employees, who both had rock-solid alibis, we put our investigative journalism team to work to get to the bottom of the matter. ( Editor’s note: We don’t actually have an investigative journalism team, so I just made a few phone calls).

In a phone conversation a representative at Salt & Stone, told the Kenwood Press that, indeed, two customers at the restaurant whom he believed to be employees of the Kenwood Press didn’t like their oysters and left without paying.

Before you ask — it wasn’t Paul and me. We were in the basement of our home on Warm Springs Road assembling the Sept. 15 issue of the newspaper. We didn’t have time to go out on a deadline day, even though it was Paul’s birthday … and for the record, I never eat oysters.

Paul wanted to ask for security footage, but I thought that was a bit extreme.

What about our wonderful and talented Kenwood Press contributors? Could it have been two of them? Jim Shere, Shannon Lee, Tracy Salcedo, Squire Fridell, Robert Kourik, Julie Atwood, or someone else? No way. All are highly evolved humans and would never cause a scene in a restaurant, let alone leave without paying.

Perhaps the former publishers of the Kenwood Press, Alec and Ann Peters? A quick phone call confirmed their alibi.

One more idea: we have Kenwood Press hats and T-shirts for sale at the KP offices at 13700 Arnold Dr. in Glen Ellen (fashionable hats for $20; men’s or women’s T-shirts for $25). Maybe someone was dressed in Kenwood Press swag?

We haven’t sold much yet, so we quickly contacted everyone we know has purchased a hat or T-shirt (Archie Horton, Nick Brown, Pat Carlin Sr.), and it wasn’t any of them. ( Editor’s note: If you’d like a Kenwood Press hat or T-shirt, stop by the office anytime, or at our booth at the Glen Ellen Village Fair on Sunday, Oct. 10, between noon and 5 p.m.).

Perhaps we’ll never solve the mystery. At the end of the day, I’m actually flattered that someone out there feels we’re important enough to pretend to be employees of the Kenwood Press.

That said, if you have any information about the identity of these imposters, please call the us at 8335155 or email [email protected] We’d like to … um … meet them.

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