Kenwood Press

Serving the communities of Kenwood, Glen Ellen and Oakmont

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Publishers' Corner: 04/01/2017

The doctor is in

I am not really a doctor but I’d love to have the power to hand out prescriptions when I deem it necessary. I’d scribble something illegible, tear off the paper with authority, and in deadly serious tones let my “patient” know my learned diagnosis.

Cranky people? Here’s a prescription for hugs. Especially cranky people? Three refills. Luckily, you can’t overdose on hugs, unless of course the hugs are from a large, overly friendly bear.

I’m at a restaurant and there’s “that guy” who is constantly berating the wait staff. I’d calmly walk over to inform him he suffers from chronic entitlement, and hand him his prescription. Get a life, leave a 25 percent tip, and be a waiter in a restaurant that’s getting slammed. And then I’d tell him to call me in the morning to see if he feels better. I bet he will.

Another scenario: I’m chilling out at my favorite coffee shop and there’s “that guy” – not the same guy that was at the restaurant, but you get the drift – who’s on his laptop and talking really loudly on his phone. Please, God, no one wants to hear about what Tammy in Marketing did wrong. Dr. Peters strolls over and diagnoses the patient with borderline Stage Four obnoxiousness. The prescription? Take two doses of empathy and go work that thing out with Tammy in Marketing for goodness sake.

A young something is complaining about how slow the Wi-Fi is. Oh no, will the cat video ever load? While Dr. Peters can somewhat sympathize, I need to give her a prescription for plenty of perspective. Remember when, like all of 20 years ago, it took a day to do anything online? So relax, take the time to watch grass grow if you really want to see something slow.

How about the folks who think American democracy is over because one political party controls the major arms of government? Prescription – a big dose of history taken with a heaping tablespoon of civic involvement. We’ve been through more dangerous times before – remember that thing called the Civil War?

The most frequent prescription I would give would be laughter. The best medicine, right? We all go through life’s ups and downs, and I find that seeing the humor in almost any situation keeps me sane. There are all sorts of articles about how laughter boosts immunity, combats depression, burns calories, increases resilience, and, the best part, it’s contagious! Catching laughter is better than catching the flu, for sure. I can’t really help you with the flu.

That’ll be five cents, please.


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